8. Survivors, Loneliness, and a Cucking Treat

CW for the Episode: Assault–please skip to 16:14 to go straight to question 2.  Lina starts this week’s episode by talking about how trauma informs Kink and BDSM, and the healing aspect that can come along with it. But big spoiler alert, there is no magical cure for trauma. And that’s okay! In fact, your trauma doesn’t need to even be involved with your Kinkiness at all if you so choose. Next up, Lina covers what loneliness can look like in BDSM and the self-shaming tendencies we have towards figuring out our roles and desires–and provides validation in having likes and dislikes and how to address those needs as submissives. And finally, hear Lina wax on the poetics of Cucking and what it can bring to the Kinky table, especially as a potential bridge between monogamy and non. And what to do about that lil thing called jealousy and how best to address it in moving towards threesomes, cucking, and/or ENM together.  Esther Perel’s Mating in Captivity: https://bookshop.org/a/14567/9780060753641 Ethical Slut: https://bookshop.org/a/14567/9780399579660 Dan Savage: https://www.thestranger.com/savage-love/2020/01/14/42559563/savage-love    Have a question about BDSM, sex, dating, relationships, Dom/sub dynamics, and anything else you’d like to ask Lina? Submit yours by emailing a voice memo to [email protected] - there is no question too bizarre or too basic!   Still thirsty for community? Join us on the Ask a Sub Patreon and have access to the most wholesome and kinky discord community! Check it out over at www.patreon.com/askasub   Get 20% off Lina’s Conscious Kink course with code PODCAST at checkout https://www.askasub.com/conscious-kink    You can follow Lina over at @askasub on both Instagram and Twitter!    Make sure to subscribe, drop us a 5-star rating, and tell all your filthy friends about the show!   Host, Producer - Lina Dune | Producer, Editor - Stella Hartmann | Producer, Research - Caroline Stephens | Music - Dan Molad  Art by Kayleigh Denner