Verses Composed upon Reading a Review from Tripadvisor

The Tourist Board of Xanadu Did recently impose a fee On those who travel far from home To visit Kubla’s pleasure dome Of $20, 9 – 3 So twice five miles of fertile ground With fence and wire are girdled round And signs proclaiming “ENTRY AT THE GATE” Where gather many a camera-bearing crowd And here are docents, who in solemn state Explain the Mongol histories aloud But oh! That deep romantic chasm protracting Into a hill, athwart a cedarn cover A savage region, visitors attracting By actresses, forever reenacting A woman wailing to her demon-lover And from this chasm, with ceaseless turmoil spilling Crowds of old men in fat thick pants are milling And there, a fountain momently is forced: Amid whose swift half-intermitted burst Groups of eight to ten people, screaming ever White-water-raft upon the sacred river