156: What Do You Do?

How many times have you been asked, “What do you do?” Or “What does your dad do?” or “What does your husband do?” Aside from the possible conversation about how we could be better at not just assuming automatically that the men make all the money (we'll save that one for another day), I always cringe a little at this question because it of course implies, “What do you do for work?” or “How do you make money?” What I'd love to change in our society is the idea that what we do (or how we make money) is the pinnacle of what defines us. What you do is so much more than how money comes into your bank account, right? Today Neil and I are talking about his journey with this - the idea that what you do for work defines you. We're sharing his story of losing his job in a career he loved, to moving into a job that humbled him to the core, and how that led to him truly defining what his purpose is in this life.   This week’s episode is brought to you by Lumineux. Go to getlumineux.com/mintarrow and enter code mintarrow to get 15% off your first order of certified non-toxic, plant and mineral based, teeth whitening products.   Time Stamps: [01:00] - Corrine explores the relationship between “what you do” and identity. [02:41] - Neil is someone who once loved his work and talking about his work. Why did he love talking about it? [05:25] - People usually pull a lot of assumptions when they hear what you do. [06:50] - Neil shares how his view of his work shifted after the family moved to Southern California. [08:30] - Corrine and Neil explain why moving to Southern California brought up more challenges than they imagined. [10:29] - When you already feel that you’re sinking, it can be hard to get out of that mode. [12:12] - What is Neil’s reflection on his work performance at that time? [14:53] - Neil recalls when he faced an inevitable truth about his addiction. [16:34] - What is Corrine’s understanding of that moment from the perspective of a spouse? [18:48] - Neil explains when he was finally let go from his job. [20:41] - What did Neil and Corrine think as it seemed many things were falling apart? [23:05] - Neil and Corrine share how they got the idea to help promote essential oil to make some money. [25:31] - What actually happened that made the entrepreneurial side of Neil and Corrine grow? [27:42] - Neil discusses the drastic flip that came when talking about what he does during his new work. [30:12] - Corrine and Neil joke about what Neil would rather do during that time in life.  [33:02] - In times of unexpected change, that period can be a moment of transformation to a higher level of ourselves. [34:57] - Validation from God vs. False Identity [37:12] - There are times where transformation will take us through pain that we don’t quite understand yet. [39:25] - Neil says what he learned about work and identity helped him find a lesson in his recovery. [42:17] - Transformation can take you to new opportunities to show gifts that you did not get to reveal before. [44:46] - Figure out your life’s purpose; it’ll be one of the best moments in the marathon of your life. [46:40] - Corrine and Neil reflect on the work-life balance and family time. [49:18] - What is the measure of your life? [52:07] - Corrine explores what she sees as things that are part of who she is and how she shows up in the world. [54:56] - Being here is about love and service. [57:09] - Love yourself and understand who you are.   Supporting Resources: “Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man’s Soul” Book by John Eldredge “Mere Christianity” Book by C.S. Lewis  “How Will You Measure Your Life?” Book by Clayton M. Christensen