Peace Talk Episode 221: How do I?.....The faulty assumption in this question that's very painful

A long list of people have submitted questions that begin with "how do I?"  It's so normal and understandable. My mind does exactly the same thing. Of course it would love to know, what a fabulous question.  But there's a baseline assumption in the question itself, that must be questioned, for a true relaxation to occur: the belief that I am an individual person who is missing something. I don't have the answer. I don't know how. I really have to find out how, it's imperative.  What if you didn't have to know how, and the thing you're seeking is not actually missing? And this doesn't mean not studying, not enjoying learning, or never gathering information...strangely enough. This is about not being identified as "the person who doesn't know how."  Or worse, the person who is broken, damaged, messed up, missing something. The person who is wrong.  Who would you be without that troubling story? Even when it comes to addiction/compulsion? Get on the Grace Notes newsletter mailing list to learn about Grace's work and upcoming events, and other support for questioning our thinking patterns when we feel stuck. https://workwithgrace.lpages.co/sign-up-for-grace-notes-in-your-inbox/ Upcoming fall in-person retreat October 26-31, 2023 Washington state near Bremerton in the woods. Join me! IN PERSON Seattle, Washington Eat, Inquire, Love Retreat June 25-July 2, 2023 https://www.workwithgrace.com/summer-retreat/ If you'd like help with emotional eating or compulsive eating, see the map I created I call the Nine Step Eating Peace Framework here:  https://workwithgrace.lpages.co/eating-peace-framework/ For more information about the Eating Peace Method, visit here: https://www.workwithgrace.com/eating-peace-process/ Grace Bell, Certified Facilitator of The Work since 2007, has a private practice both online and in person, assisting people from all walks of life to identify and question their interpretations around their experience. She has a special love and specific programs for those suffering from eating issues including disordered eating (disordered thinking) of all kinds--having suffered from this behavior and thought/feeling process herself and finding an unshakable peace within around eating, food, health and behaviors with eating.  As Byron Katie offers us (founder of The Work); when we believe what we think, it creates unnecessary suffering. When we question what we think, we feel lighter and less serious about what is. We even begin to laugh. We notice who we really are is peaceful already, a human being living life as best we can--learning, growing, loving.  To receive notice of Eating Peace programs, videos and vlog posts, visit www.workwithgrace.com/eating-peace and join the mailing list. To join the Grace Notes family of readers right now, Grace's popular blog on using The Work of Byron Katie to grow a peaceful life, get the thorough START HERE guide to letting The Work, work right here: https://workwithgrace.leadpages.co/start-here-guidebook/ Where to find me: workwithgrace.com grace notes from the past at workingwithgrace.com https://www.facebook.com/WorkWithGrace/ https://twitter.com/ByronKatieCoach https://www.linkedin.com/in/workwithgrace/ https://www.instagram.com/byronkatiecoach/